Swimming alone vs Swimming with a Toddler

Swimming alone.

Swimming before having a child is such an enjoyable leisure activity, things to consider before you set off;

– Hairless in places where no hair should be?
– Toe nails, are they respectable? imagine if someone glanced over whilst showering and saw chipped nail varnish
– What swimming costume to wear? Speedo = no boobs and seems to merge belly and boobs as one, bikini a bit risky, also want to look like I’m serious about this not just chatting at the sides of the pool.
– Which lane? Assess the swimming lanes, no one is ever in the right lane, even though there is a polite sign, yes it actually says a polite notice, seriously no one takes any notice.
– Hmmm have I got time for sauna and a steam after, probably, maybe a 10 min swim (don’t want to over do it and not be able to walk as I have planned to wear heels tomorrow) then relax, works a bit stressful at moment (looking back I didn’t
know I had it so easy)

– Pack shampoo, conditioner, whole skin care range, nice body lotion, hair straightens, full make up.

– Leave relaxed, refreshed and smug that you did a bit of exercise.

Swimming lessons with toddler.

– Start at breakfast with various bribes, something along the lines of “If you listen to the teacher you will be able to have Pom Bears or visit the café and have cake/custard cream” depending on whatever is trending in the toddlers menu at the time. Continue reading

10 Things that keep me sane

1. Working (luckily I do a job share) a chance to wee on your own, drink tea, play mum to some of my work colleagues and try and act like I’m the adult (when did that happen? now I have a child I’m considered to be an adult). Enjoy normal conversations about celebrity bb but I’m actually forcing myself to watch it so I can join in with the conversation (don’t want to feel like I’m out of touch). I try to keep up with all that is cool but I’m not saying things like ‘that’s sic’ because then it would be like I’m trying too hard and that would just be embarrassing.

2. Realising I live in a different time zone to work colleagues/anyone without kids, for example 5am is when they are thinking of finishing up the night my 5am is answering the dummy call. When I ask someone ‘when do they actually play these durex ads I never seen one?’ response ‘that’s because you go to bed too early”. True. Continue reading